Are You Angry with a Loved One for Dying?

After the death of a spouse, parent or another loved one, people are often surprised to find themselves feeling angry with the person. Experts say you need to understand anger is one stage of the grieving process and is in response to the painful emotions brought on by the loss. While grief is something all of us will experience at one time or another, remember we can only feel grief if we have had the privilege to feel love. 

The various stages of grief can include shock, anger, disbelief, guilt, and profound sadness. Grief can adversely impact our physical and mental health and may interfere with many aspects of our life including sleeping and eating. Another thing experts say is to keep in mind grief is a personal experience and everyone goes through it in their own way and in their own time.   

If you are a person whose grief has become overwhelming, it may help to share your feelings with a grief support group or to talk to a professional grief counselor. Myths surrounding grief include you must stay strong, or you need to ignore it, and it will go away. Professionals say for real healing, people need to face their grief. Another myth regards the timeline. Many people think the grieving process should take a year, but for many it may take longer. Moreover it is important to remember accepting the loss does not mean the person is forgotten.   

To grieve, acknowledge your pain and accept the fact you can feel a range of emotions including anger at the situation or at the person for “deserting you.” Treat yourself with love and support, and see your doctor if you continue to have a hard time.  

If a family member suffers from Alzheimer’s or another form of dementia, we invite you to take a look at West San Jose’s newest memory care facility, MorningStar at West Valley. We strive to provide compassionate, holistic memory care that is guided by our signature program, Lavender Sky, MorningStar’s philosophy and programming in Memory Care. We open in the last quarter of 2022 and look forward to helping you select a suite for your loved one.